Emotionally Whole

Have you ever said, or heard someone say, "I'm just not a feelings person." Did you know that this is scientifically impossible? Everyone has an emotional brain, it's actually the part of our brain that is the truest part of who we are and affects all other parts of the brain as well as your entire being.

The midbrain is where our limbic system exists, this is where emotional processing happens, and lo and behold, this is true for every single human!

Science tells us that there are also neuro-chemicals in our guts, so our bodies also hold emotions, which means that we can live embodied-the entire scope of our human experience is lived in the mind, soul, and body. I'd also stretch that to say, our unconscious, split-off feelings manifest deep within the body.

The healthiest relational dynamic is that which you have two people who have a competent dialogue about their inner life- why they feel what they feel, and so on.

This dynamic creates space for quality, safe connection, and the ability to repair sufficiently when there have been ruptures.

The emotionally whole person is also strong and wise, they can operate in discernment because they know how to pay attention to their own vulnerability and set boundaries when needed.

Relationships suffer when we are cut off emotionally.

If you grew up without parents who connected with you at a heart level, or who even worse, created developmental trauma because they were so incredibly unfit emotionally, it may take awhile to get to know yourself internally. Be gentle with yourself. Settle into a pace of self-discovery that feels good to you.

If you grew up in destructive church or religious environments that told you your feelings were a sin, they were wrong. Emotional intelligence is honoring the brain that God created replete with emotions and wired for fulfilling connections.

Carl Jung declared that we have feelings first, then thoughts, and from there, behavior flows. If you are trying to change yourself by mastering your thoughts, you will be hitting a dead end time after time. Try instead to get to know the heart of your brain, this is where you will feel most alive, it's where you'll find you!