You Matter More Than You Know
It was a heavy week last week hearing about the recent tragic loss of a young pastor by suicide; I wish to extend my deepest compassion to his wife and his children.
As I've been reflecting on this loss, I've been thinking about what it means for all of us.
My friends, it is important to know that ALL of your feelings belong.
Every- single-one-of-them. There are no bad or wrong feelings, we only need to learn how to feel them. Tragically, in church, there has been the teaching that certain feelings aren't allowed, this is a dangerous way of talking about emotional life.
Second, it's normal to struggle, to feel anxious, depressed, or lonely.
Third, if Jesus is our example of how to be fully human, then it is important to be honest, as he was, about our inner life and invite our friends into the arduous process with us.
Can you name your feelings without shame? Are you able to speak them and accept them? This is the hard work. And lastly - everybody has an emotional brain. To say, "I'm not an emotional person" just doesn't work anymore. Being whole means that we lovingly integrate all the parts of our interior life. It is ok to not be ok. Regardless of the title you hold, you get to be human. No perfect people exist. We need each other, in full authenticity. I've struggled along the way with my own anxiety and times of depression, and have needed to surrender in the arms of a therapist, and a loving community. If your heart is heavy, please reach out. Don't go at it alone. It's ok to not be ok. If you're hurting, or lonely, take the risk to put your voice to the feelings.